REFLECTING & WRITING-IN-PROCESS -Kinship & Contradiction:
Rites, Passages, Ways
Research Praxis, Reclaiming Ritual, Bodies Of Proximity Studies into Relation, Being & Non-Being, Resistance, Solidarity, Violence, Discord, Dissonance, Kinship.
Labours of Doom, Labours of Cultural Wounds.
Intra Psychic, Multiplicities, Pluralities, Bodies in Systems
2024 - 2025, ongoing
One Hour Open-Access Online Session which opens a Ceremonial Space held in sound, guiding us into Depth and through Earth Chakra, with the intention of rememberment during times of dismemberment.
Pre-Lingual Spaces of Call & Response
Part of Research Work “Kinship & Contradiction”.
October 2024
SPACES OF PSYCHIC BELONGING
A COMMUNAL PRACTICE IN RECOGNISING THE GREAT MOTHER - RE CLAIMING - KIN - RESISTANCE & DISMANTLING
A COMMUNAL PRACTICE IN RECOGNISING THE GREAT MOTHER - RE CLAIMING - KIN - RESISTANCE & DISMANTLING
Community Garden Bed as meeting place, Psychic Connection & Grid Work, Rooted in the Earth.
B-16, Berlin Templehof
Part of Research Work “Kinship & Contradiction”.
Seeded in Spring 2024 - Ongoing
Stewardship Inherited from Sound Listening Artist & Doula Francis Sosta
UPON THE PSYCHIC CORRESPONDENCE OF DIGITAL FLESH [LIVE]
Meditational Sound for Portals into Digital Alchemy
Part of Research Work “Saya Soma: Shadow Body in Encoded System”
3 Movement Guided Whispered Mediation - Ambient - PolyRhythm - Shakers, Drums, Gong -
2023 - On going
KINSHIP & CONTRADICTION
Relational & Cultural Wound-Portal, Elemental & Ancestral Spiritual Abolitionism.‘The true shackles are those caging the souls of those who oppress us.’-
Voice of Lenny Foster, Leonard Peltier’s Spiritual Advisor.
poetic mapping and constellating, writing practices for dialogue,
as architechures in navigation of erasures,
re-membering, re-claiming, re-pairing,
recognising relational blindspots
Solidarity Studies, Collective Liberation
Depth Mediation, Ceremonial Research
2024 - ongoing
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Kinship and Contradiction, occurs on the ‘out there’ edges of Self, between ‘World-as-Oracle’ (Synchronicity), ‘Identity as Path’ (Transforming) and the Essential (Home);
‘Relation scatters from being’ - Edouard Glissant
(OUCH!)
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Deeply inside the space of Witness, consistent at touching into and stretching the futher most edges of Containment: Kinship, as solidarity, as freedom, as de-conditioning, as shadow work, (as dissolving, as turning inside out, as madness, as the psychotic); threatens ‘contained’ survival.
Addressing fractures and fissures of perception, position, posture, privelidge, violence, the toxic, the life saving quality of ambivalence and liberatory resources of attention and time, Kinship & Contradiction is an articulation and amplification into the space of invisible, unfathomable entanglement.
In an escape from centrism, we have travelled through double, third, and fourth, into the multiple, into the generative. Our re-turn into meticulous re-animations of all phenonema expand - layers of permeable and impermeable recognition, wrapping de-humanisation/re-humanisation paradigms. Must we claim this space for contradiction, as a more-than-human compassion, or are we able to dissolve, unbeome, into Elemental Being, Humus, seeking and adopting templates of beingness as humility, from the impersonal - as mountains, valleys, rocks, rivers, soils?
Within Kin is an urge to be centreless and borderless. Inner distance, then, is a requirement from internalised (externalised) psychic cruelties, forging forward for liberation, for actualisation - is an inner salvation, self witness. In the surrender to a necessary inner distance, an inner limit, we might access life-enabling contradiction enough to transform.
Building on previous research, Shadow Body in Encoded System, the virtual, stretches far enough into non-being, towards constellating space for the polycrisis within - at ‘the not yet’; of polyseed, we rely on a new capacity to trust: Destruction As a Cause of Coming Into Being.*
Multi-dialogues emerge, converge and diverge from lived and living contradictions: failures, alliances (both forming and broken) we seek to navigate ways towards innerstanding, orbiting Kin, as ancient and weathered fabric, through our collective trauma,
unbroken, healed & unhealed.
Though being able to locate this trauma within a system: (where does the real trauma ‘lie’ if not within the imperialst, patriachal and white supreme) and this system as lying within or in proximity to Alt(ered)-Ego psyche
- the internalised call and responses, from wound to wound,
giving parts of this transforming and relational fabric momentary illusions of universality: utopian inflations, while attempting extention into the objective, rather landing in the eternally subjective, speculative, manifesting-poetic on the egde of becoming.
Kinship & Contradiction seeks an innerstanding into intimate politics of a collective de-colonising psyche. Infastructure takes the form of dismantlings (deconstructions), and reparations (reconstructions).
The mapping of this project futher investigates and centralises a forever-yet-to-be-born divergent wisdom of this ‘Wound to Wound relating’, perhaps of an Orbital Re-membering and Forgetting.
Especially re-centralising for the alt(ered) ego of a post-colonial, post-human, post-digital, hydro-black-feminst and nuero-expansive psyche, through an ancestral lens, in recognition of Spirit, while prioritising accessibility and simplicity.
In relation everything defined is dissolved.
Kinship is always contradiction.
(written, 27th June, 2025)
Durational Performance, Dramaturgy, sand timer, matches, blanket : Leman Sevda Darıcıoğlu
Dialogues: Sarah Martinus
Images/Archival: Berk Ayakka
‘When one of us remembers who we really are, all of us remember’ - Pickle Bar, Berlin
︎︎︎Link to showCuration: Misal Adnan Yıldız, Host: Anastasia Marukhina
Durational Performance, Dramaturgy, sand timer, matches, blanket : Leman Sevda Darıcıoğlu
Dialogues: Sarah Martinus
Images/Archival: Berk Ayakka
Exceprts of Dialogue from Pickle Bar:
‘Relational remembering is wound to wound.
Who will bend, when the mutable won’t?
How do I articulate the space(s) inside a divide?
How do we call for an articulation of the spaces inside us, that divide us from ourselves?
There is a hum, a whisper, a scream, a silence…
Learn how to protect and speak for, the wind, and when the time comes, bring it to water*.
It is such a perfect arrangement, for wisdom to hide away in death*.
Although this night darkens the spirit, it illuminates and fills her with light*.
Within every thread of being, every fibre of reality unwoven: transformation IS.
‘
- Sarah, Re-Membering & Collective Liberation, 2025 *
*quotes taken from Sarah’s research-in-praxis; a meeting place of a council of Earth Wisdoms, 2025.
*Malidoma Somé
*Peter Kingsley
*St John Of The Cross
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‘It is within a Body of Proximity, an Open Body, a multiplicity body that the architectures of labour of the human cultural wound is lying.
The labour of the european cultural wound, the imperial, colonial, patriachial wound of culture, of a substance missing, of cagey architectures, of an unclaimed portal to soul, is sitting as always included within an awakening or expanding body of proximity, who finds any way possible, not to self reject or self annihilate.
This is a labour of carrying collective doom, carrying living degradation, and carrying the living dead.
The open multiplicity body, is a body who has been dehumanised, extracted of soul, the subject of scrutiny, avoided, unseen, unallowed centralisation. This body moves into earth kinship for redemption, salvation, re-animation.‘
‘Discern the fault lines between ambiguity and your bypass. Distance. Your bypass is always there, because privelidge is always there, because comfort is always there, because limit is always there.... No edges, no centre, the centre of psyche is everywhere. What kind of service does perspective offer?’
- Notes from Sarah, June 2025
WHY LOOK AT KINSHIP & CONTRADICTION?
Personal identity, ‘being visible’, deconditioning and Essential Identity are all relational movements which relate to where our own connection with ‘woundedness’ is lying. The wound has been internalised within the hyper individual, at a cost to agency, personal power, democracy, resiliency, diversity, emergence and culture. That location of the wound needs to move into the space of culture, but then how does our healing happen, how does the reparation occur? It must also happen in culture as it must happen in relation: Specifically the reparation must be originating from the extraction portal, from within western, and white culture, colonial culture.
Before this can happen, as we can see with the dissents and awakenings, into kin through the webs of solidarity, into non heirachy, into alliance, into mutuality, also comes the rise of the awareness of externalised oppressors - the violent, the intrusive, psychic ‘bad object’ forcing their way in - appropriating, stealing, consuming, hijacking, looming over, extracting, intimidating.... and that being a mirroring system done to an inner Earth and Water within.
Kinship as Solidarity, Kinship as Animist, re-animation, and Kinship as new system of universality, which de-localises it’s centres of generative wisdoms through contradiction, into the spaces of echo, of relation.
Personal identity, ‘being visible’, deconditioning and Essential Identity are all relational movements which relate to where our own connection with ‘woundedness’ is lying. The wound has been internalised within the hyper individual, at a cost to agency, personal power, democracy, resiliency, diversity, emergence and culture. That location of the wound needs to move into the space of culture, but then how does our healing happen, how does the reparation occur? It must also happen in culture as it must happen in relation: Specifically the reparation must be originating from the extraction portal, from within western, and white culture, colonial culture.
Before this can happen, as we can see with the dissents and awakenings, into kin through the webs of solidarity, into non heirachy, into alliance, into mutuality, also comes the rise of the awareness of externalised oppressors - the violent, the intrusive, psychic ‘bad object’ forcing their way in - appropriating, stealing, consuming, hijacking, looming over, extracting, intimidating.... and that being a mirroring system done to an inner Earth and Water within.
Kinship as Solidarity, Kinship as Animist, re-animation, and Kinship as new system of universality, which de-localises it’s centres of generative wisdoms through contradiction, into the spaces of echo, of relation.
RESEARCH QUESTIONS // DATA ... development ...
Where is the edge of Kinship? Is it moving? How is it informed, whose voices form it, and how does it inform a way of relational non-being?
Through a post-human and ecological spiritual lens, yet remaining in the political, if any form of kinship needs to be imagined, with a centre of all things being acknowlegded as being in the Darkness, within Spirit itself, and within Ceremony as process - how can we as non indigenous bodies, as western concsiousness, deprogram and deconstruct enough in order to reconstruct through ways of reparation?
How can we bring back an authentic Body of Ceremony, into an erased, missing, lost, cultural identity as trans, inter, femme, eNBy, queer, black, brown, indigenous, diasporic, politisised and white cis assiged bodies?
Where is the loci of the wound? Where does defecit or attention, lie? And if it is to be in the systemic, and not only back in the black or brown body, nor the colonised body, nor the white or european body, how can we collectively pass through it, towards a language of kinship as recognition of locations and proximities, in a dismantling and repairing constellation? How does kinship as a process, form collective liberation? Who is in service, how are they in service and who or what is served?
Is there a mechanism for or how could a mechanism or way of knowlegde production through kinship and contradiction, as a practice, become a tool for intentional collective non local post-extractivist and kinship oriented futures?
POETICS //
Where are boundaries (ambivalences) of belonging, freedom, sanity & madness, shifting in relation to geopolitical time?
Possessed by pains of an oppressor, How do disciplined and liberated bodies align? (re-focus)
What is a ‘borderless’ psychic visioning in a post-digital, post-human ‘re-humanisation’ inclusive of yet decentralising, internalised psychic cruelties of liberation?
What other grammars or gazes into lineage, might we have access to, other than to retell our lifestories in terms of how much we have been injured?
How can we revison the service of empathy into magnetics, coemergences?
PERSONAL SHADOW WORKS //
- For a body of multiplicities, How many wounds do I have access to?
- Which depth, ie: layers, translucencies, opacities, can we find within this wound?
- How deep is ‘inside out’, where do I loose self, can I do this by choice, why would I? where is the limit?
- How to treat the wound of the oppressor, internalised? What does it (de)serve?
Where is the edge of Kinship? Is it moving? How is it informed, whose voices form it, and how does it inform a way of relational non-being?
Through a post-human and ecological spiritual lens, yet remaining in the political, if any form of kinship needs to be imagined, with a centre of all things being acknowlegded as being in the Darkness, within Spirit itself, and within Ceremony as process - how can we as non indigenous bodies, as western concsiousness, deprogram and deconstruct enough in order to reconstruct through ways of reparation?
How can we bring back an authentic Body of Ceremony, into an erased, missing, lost, cultural identity as trans, inter, femme, eNBy, queer, black, brown, indigenous, diasporic, politisised and white cis assiged bodies?
Where is the loci of the wound? Where does defecit or attention, lie? And if it is to be in the systemic, and not only back in the black or brown body, nor the colonised body, nor the white or european body, how can we collectively pass through it, towards a language of kinship as recognition of locations and proximities, in a dismantling and repairing constellation? How does kinship as a process, form collective liberation? Who is in service, how are they in service and who or what is served?
Is there a mechanism for or how could a mechanism or way of knowlegde production through kinship and contradiction, as a practice, become a tool for intentional collective non local post-extractivist and kinship oriented futures?
POETICS //
Where are boundaries (ambivalences) of belonging, freedom, sanity & madness, shifting in relation to geopolitical time?
Possessed by pains of an oppressor, How do disciplined and liberated bodies align? (re-focus)
What is a ‘borderless’ psychic visioning in a post-digital, post-human ‘re-humanisation’ inclusive of yet decentralising, internalised psychic cruelties of liberation?
What other grammars or gazes into lineage, might we have access to, other than to retell our lifestories in terms of how much we have been injured?
How can we revison the service of empathy into magnetics, coemergences?
PERSONAL SHADOW WORKS //
- For a body of multiplicities, How many wounds do I have access to?
- Which depth, ie: layers, translucencies, opacities, can we find within this wound?
- How deep is ‘inside out’, where do I loose self, can I do this by choice, why would I? where is the limit?
- How to treat the wound of the oppressor, internalised? What does it (de)serve?
RESEARCH AS CEREMONY //
Held as communal writing sessions, online, TBA.
We will also take the form of a multifaith prayer circles, these can be moments to write with our Ancestors, to write to Self, to centralise, to multiply, to dissapear, to merge, to become.
We focus on receiving downloads, drops, and codes.
Do ideas come from complex, grating dynamics of intellect, or from release?
Perhaps these research as ceremony sessions can be regular check ins to develop resilient download practices.
OPEN CALL FOR PRACTITIONERS TO JOIN THE RESEARCH :
(yet to be advertised, opened)
Pre Requisite for Researchers:
- Acknowledgement of Imannence as being in the centre of a Darkness - Sacred Whole, as creator of experience, who co-emerges with gaze.
- Holistic, non-heirachical, non-local gaze [deprogramming, black feminist/queer]
Held as communal writing sessions, online, TBA.
We will also take the form of a multifaith prayer circles, these can be moments to write with our Ancestors, to write to Self, to centralise, to multiply, to dissapear, to merge, to become.
We focus on receiving downloads, drops, and codes.
Do ideas come from complex, grating dynamics of intellect, or from release?
Perhaps these research as ceremony sessions can be regular check ins to develop resilient download practices.
OPEN CALL FOR PRACTITIONERS TO JOIN THE RESEARCH :
(yet to be advertised, opened)
Pre Requisite for Researchers:
- Acknowledgement of Imannence as being in the centre of a Darkness - Sacred Whole, as creator of experience, who co-emerges with gaze.
- Holistic, non-heirachical, non-local gaze [deprogramming, black feminist/queer]
MODES OF RESEARCH //
Research questions will be worked through within ordinary realities, non ordinary realities, in practice, through drum journeys, ritual, dance journeys, dreaming, downloads, oracle readings and divinations, in accompaniment with resourcing through existing knowledge banks.
The forms of practical work could take the action of soul retrieval, extraction, power transferral, live art, dance, sound or other presence and somatic technique related.
Research is made through writing practice, where the sharing of information through social (online) networks is then collected back into the body of the text. The text forms through collections of short burst messages, ‘rants’, and affirmations.
The field-based ancestral research work activates a function of decentralising.
An organic dataset is recognised within the group mediations, and casework Sarah has been undertaking through 2022-2025.
Research questions will be worked through within ordinary realities, non ordinary realities, in practice, through drum journeys, ritual, dance journeys, dreaming, downloads, oracle readings and divinations, in accompaniment with resourcing through existing knowledge banks.
The forms of practical work could take the action of soul retrieval, extraction, power transferral, live art, dance, sound or other presence and somatic technique related.
Research is made through writing practice, where the sharing of information through social (online) networks is then collected back into the body of the text. The text forms through collections of short burst messages, ‘rants’, and affirmations.
The field-based ancestral research work activates a function of decentralising.
An organic dataset is recognised within the group mediations, and casework Sarah has been undertaking through 2022-2025.
RESEARCH TIMELINE / PROCESSUAL OUTCOMES
2025:
October, 2025 | TBA - ‘unbecomings’, Berlin.
- Conceptual Strategy - Relational - Sub-Political -
14 June 2025 | Misal Adnan Yıldız in collaboration with Leman Darıcıoğlu, Sarah Martinus, and Berk Akkaya, “…When one of us Remembers who we really are, all of us Remember…”, book launch, performance based research and discussion, Pickle Bar, Berlin | In collaboration with Staatliche Kunsthalle Baden-Baden
Feb - April, 2025 | Social Work, Stewardship, Project & Site Management, Participary, Transformative Justice Social-Arts-Incubator: Blocklab447 -> in Buckow, NK, with Teenagers
2024:
- Rooting - Activisms - Solidarity - Mediations -
CONNECTED ONLINE OPEN PRAXIS:
WHICH CULTURE IS MY TRUE CULTURE?
EARTH & CONTRADICTION MEDICINE
Ceremony For Depth Re-Memberment - Bodies Of Proximity - online session. Listen Here.
CONNECTED RESEARCH CEREMONY:
9th June 2024, Roots To Freedom, Ancestral Belonging Ceremony, BIPOC, TIN* & Bodies of Proximity Centralising, Holographic Healing Nest, Berlin.
2025:
October, 2025 | TBA - ‘unbecomings’, Berlin.
- Conceptual Strategy - Relational - Sub-Political -
14 June 2025 | Misal Adnan Yıldız in collaboration with Leman Darıcıoğlu, Sarah Martinus, and Berk Akkaya, “…When one of us Remembers who we really are, all of us Remember…”, book launch, performance based research and discussion, Pickle Bar, Berlin | In collaboration with Staatliche Kunsthalle Baden-Baden
Feb - April, 2025 | Social Work, Stewardship, Project & Site Management, Participary, Transformative Justice Social-Arts-Incubator: Blocklab447 -> in Buckow, NK, with Teenagers
2024:
- Rooting - Activisms - Solidarity - Mediations -
CONNECTED ONLINE OPEN PRAXIS:
WHICH CULTURE IS MY TRUE CULTURE?
EARTH & CONTRADICTION MEDICINE
Ceremony For Depth Re-Memberment - Bodies Of Proximity - online session. Listen Here.
CONNECTED RESEARCH CEREMONY:
9th June 2024, Roots To Freedom, Ancestral Belonging Ceremony, BIPOC, TIN* & Bodies of Proximity Centralising, Holographic Healing Nest, Berlin.
PSYCHIC PROCESS / MECHANISMS:
Amplification, Constellation, Shadow Work
What is to be found, on the grinding edges of polycrisis?
Transformative Mutually Beneficial Maneures (Root)
We will be dissolving into humus, dissonance of soils, shits & manures. We search deeper into the being-ness amongst transformations of poison to cure, curse to gift.
Earth Destructions (Fire) (Sacral Chakra)
We will be looking into Volcanos, how Islands are formed through Volcanic erruption and into the mineral production of the Earth, from Fire. How is an inner volcanic erruption, related to an inner salvation? This is a merging with Fire.
Water Regenerations (Heart & Soul Star)
💧~ Water is The Way Home ~ 💧
Merging with Water.
“What it is that water touches, in me? What is it that water can connect with, in me?
So that the moment when I connect with water, this can be a psychic bath.”
- Malidoma Patrice Some.
Spiritual Abolitionism (Heart & Soul Star)
is about moving the toxic or the intrusion of the oppressors wounds within us, cleaning through both the personal and the oppressors wound. We make that service for ourselves, and it automatically benefits the world, the entire ecology we reside in.
Liberation Work: Articulating positions and needs. (Visioning, Third Eye)
An act of self-care, naming practices.
Liberation Work: Asking practices. (Throat Chakra) Which is a re-centralising self esteem within the oppressed, fragmented, in parts, scapegoated psyche.
Amplification, Constellation, Shadow Work
What is to be found, on the grinding edges of polycrisis?
Transformative Mutually Beneficial Maneures (Root)
We will be dissolving into humus, dissonance of soils, shits & manures. We search deeper into the being-ness amongst transformations of poison to cure, curse to gift.
Earth Destructions (Fire) (Sacral Chakra)
We will be looking into Volcanos, how Islands are formed through Volcanic erruption and into the mineral production of the Earth, from Fire. How is an inner volcanic erruption, related to an inner salvation? This is a merging with Fire.
Water Regenerations (Heart & Soul Star)
💧~ Water is The Way Home ~ 💧
Merging with Water.
“What it is that water touches, in me? What is it that water can connect with, in me?
So that the moment when I connect with water, this can be a psychic bath.”
- Malidoma Patrice Some.
Spiritual Abolitionism (Heart & Soul Star)
is about moving the toxic or the intrusion of the oppressors wounds within us, cleaning through both the personal and the oppressors wound. We make that service for ourselves, and it automatically benefits the world, the entire ecology we reside in.
Liberation Work: Articulating positions and needs. (Visioning, Third Eye)
An act of self-care, naming practices.
Liberation Work: Asking practices. (Throat Chakra) Which is a re-centralising self esteem within the oppressed, fragmented, in parts, scapegoated psyche.
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BODIES OF PROXIMITY
Bodies of Proximity, to me, are bodies who witness themselves being pulled apart, fragmented, co-opted or under pressure from tides influenced by systemic, colonial, direct & indirect violences & extractions. This includes all bodies activating & bodies in any stage of their waking up process.
These can also be de-conditioning bodies -> a body descendant from colonies, a body reclaiming agency, a body asking forgiveness, and a body re-routing recognitions.
The term Body of Proximity is also simultaneously referential of the collective or the realm - Proximity to what?
Proximity to wounding is also proximity to divinity.
What happens when we centralise the fragementation?
Proximity to the parts is also proximity to the reconciliation & the transcendence.
Transcendence is to go futher than integration, because we have a ‘Holy Third’ who is greater than the sum of our parts. (I will circle back to this.)
Proximity is movement, movement is process.
And this is important to note here that Peace is not only stillness -Peace can be dynamic and in motion.
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Bodies of Proximity is an inclusive term, self elected.
It is inclusive and centralising of queerness and blackness.
Proximity favours The Darkness, leans towards it.
We are born from proximity as we are born from Darkness.
Proximity also speaks to relational constellation the intrapsychic and the body of a reality as an agential being in creating us or ‘emerging us’.
Proximity is relational.
Bodies of Proximity co-emerge best from within the heart of each other through seeds of sincerity.
Proximity is community & network.
RITUAL BEGIN
RITUAL BEGIN
1. Opening The Space
Recognition of the 4 cardinal directions, North South East and West, Above & Below.
Opening the Senses, Lighting Candles, Burning Insences.
Welcome in Beauty
2. Constellating Mother Earth ( Chakra )
Calling our attention into The Body
Tender Body
The Humility of Belonging to Clay
Earth & Water
Understanding the Earth Herself She is a Chakra
Feeling into this Chakra
Allowing the breadth of Her stability find you
Gravity Embrace
3. Opening The Door (Spirals)
Inviting in Mystery, Curiosity, Chance.
This is about having Space inside ourselves
Maybe a realm of peace
Involution
There are ancient stories which tells us, we don’t need to be the hero and remake the world. All we need to do is open the door.
Welcome in a new rhythm, understanding our paths here are not linear.
The door is a Spiral, rotating, spinning.
A Spiral indicates that a clash of opposites has been resolved and transcended.
The Spiral is the path that resolves conflict, allowing of balanced movement and a natural unfolding, harmonious transformation can continue.
4. The Door Is Open (Downwards)
The Initiation, The Descent,
Dying Before you Die - To no longer live on the surface of things.
Shedding Skin.
5. Call For Power (I Breathe)
Stripping back to Simplicity
We call for Power here.
6. Calling The New World To Come To Meet Us
Enter into a
pre lingual
pre feeling
pre soma
pre physical material
pre idea
pre imagination
Space
Here in this place of Pre Being
As Ultimate Manifestor and Protector
Most Importantly is Beauty
7. Calling to the Salve - Enki (Passageway)
Prophecy.
The Earthworm, Punctum - the smallest point, a gateway to the infinite -
A voice to what doesn't have a voice.
To make contact with and then speak from another from of consciousness.
Wounded innocence, the mark of divinity
Attracting representatives of The Spirit World
Here accepting the broken and dismembered as Whole.
We hold an image of Her that encompasses more than just the dismemberment of trauma.
In the middle of things
Betwixt and Between
Light and Dark
The Grey Way
The Liminal
The passageway
8. To-See-Through-You-See-Though -To-Me (Witness)
Walls fall down, Image falls down - Co-emergence!
Merging - Melting
Boundaries Dissolve
Spirit is Watching
Spirit is Listening
Attention is Expanded
Giving Receiving
Time & Space do not Exist
We are Separate from Separation Itself.
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Animal Spirits arrive
Orb of Energy constellates
We Rotate around a Golden Flower
A Pink Lotus
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Union between all Visions
Recognition
Empathy, not Sympathy, but a shared, co carried experience.
Led by Instinct
Rotating
Deepest meeting
The Centre of Things
Source
Home
9. Closing The Space (Wings)
Recognition is
Remembering
We Wrap up with a bow this experience
Make it double right right
Thank you in Relation for keeping us connected to all that exists, cosmic web.
Thank you in Being for keeping us agential.
We forgive ourselves from and release of any gaze of incompleteness
Returning as Stewards between Earth Chakra & Soul Star.
CEREMONY
INTO DEPTH
RE-MEMBERMENT
BODIES OF PROXIMITY
Guided, Ancestral Belonging Sound Session, 2024
One Hour Open-Access Online Session which opens a Ceremonial Space held in sound, guiding us into Depth and through Earth Chakra, with the intention of rememberment during times of dismemberment.
This is a sound session especially focused for Bodies of Proximity, foremost bodies with lineages who have been silenced, or erased and bodies who are currently bearing the brunt of the trauma & violence at the growth edge of our collective, in terms of facing and recognising the spiritual intrusion of the colonial capitalist war machine.
In terms of the circle, these bodies are wisdom bringers - their traumatic experiences contain the updside down codes of liberation.
We pay special repsect to Bodies of Palestine, Congo, Sudan, Haitii, Hawaii, Kanaky, Arhnem Land, North Dakota Turtle Island - all First Nation Indigenous Lineages & Original Custodians of Land.
We Urge for Treaty & Reparation.
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RE-MEMBERMENT
Rememberment is formed through containment and witness - the function of the healing is recognition within consciousness.
We give space for a phenomena to be allowed to exist, (phenomena is Spirit).
Remembrance is important to Soul (thus, denial & bypass, traumatic, soul loosing/stealing).
Space & Being Seen is important to Soul.
There are various levels of rememberment which we are passing through on a personal and collective level at the present moment.
Perhaps on the personal level we remember lost soul parts who went into the care of spirits during any experiences of trauma, neglect or violent-impact into our energies.
Perhaps on the collective levels there is a remembering of greater truths, the struggles that were previously hidden are coming to light to be freed.
When reality and identities are broken open we wish to fall gracefully into a humble bed of Earth.
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RESEARCH & PROCESS INFORMED
This Ancestral Belonging Sound Session (Ancient Sumerian Poetic Narrative, Tao, Core-Shamanic) as recording - with drums, gong vocals, shakers and flute, is a guided Ceremony into Depth.
We Constellate The Earth Chakra, Opening The Lower Spiral Doorway & we get a chance there to express, unwind & disintegrate the old template & call through New Codes - renewed courage, rejuvenated clarity & connection with Soul Power.
As you might know, this is a research-informed practice, processually in the works gathering momentum especially through the last 4 years of opening rituals in-session, & through having been led towards particular Spiritual Energies & Poetic Story.
Everything shared here is with thanks to the community around this practice.
WHICH CULTURE IS MY TRUE CULTURE?
EARTH & CONTRADICTION MEDICINE
Decentralising from white supremacy - turning away from false ideals - and moving into Earth Based Kinship is a breaking apart and a dissolving of an entire reality-size-belief-system which had been coded into every relation and character of things - until it looked like culture.
Decentralising is not an ‘either/or’ its a ‘yes, and’.
Intergenerational trauma compacted within lineages starts to look like personaliity and culture.
Our true culture, the culture of our Body & Soul, is Earth. Rested.
Plants, Animals, Wind, Water, Cycles and Rhythms of all that we know belongs in that Culture of The Earth.
We belong to Earth.
To allow this to sprout our connection to Earth, it needs to be given space. Emergence needs space.
Our original culture is a place where contradiction is medicine and mediation a sacred process.
Contradiction and mediation - leads to the transcendence, the newness - not only an integration, and most definitely not a subjugation.
For this we acknowledge a Sacred (ie: transcendent) Cosmic Law (ie: at the greatest point of inclusivity of cosmos) which takes both Spirit (Yang, Positive Charges, Directive) and Materiality (Yin, Negative Charges, Receptive) into account.
Any dogmatic or exclusionary belief system, is not our truest most original culture.
Healthy discernment and respectful acknowledgment of difference - the choices of free will, into style and expression - They are relational layers.
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The following two passages show the multiplicity and contradiction of truths between Being and Relation.
Non Duality would say: Your true state of being is Peace/Oneness/NonDual. Anything outside of that or contra to that is is a layer of energy (which is neither good nor bad, but just is).
‘A disciplined mind is not a peaceful mind; a peaceful mind is not necessarily a silent mind.
A peaceful mind is one that is free of the illusion of separation, a mind that is no longer serving the fears, demands, neuroses and anxieties of a non-existent separate self.
Such a mind will be more or less active at different times, depending on the requirements of the circumstances, but free from the belief in separation, it is a truly peaceful mind.’
– ‘The Light of Pure Knowing’, Rupert Spira.
Kinship would say: There is no ‘Being’ and no ‘You’. There is only chaos of relation, flowing towards & away from infinite balances, dancing through moments of transparency and opacity.
‘Relation contaminates, sweetens, as a principle, or as a flowerdust... Being-as-Being is not opaque but self important... relation struggles and states itself in opacity.
It defers self-importance... the echo of being... it’s patience outdistances depths and sea.
Relation scatters from Being... It depends on Relation that the knowledge in motion of the being of the universe be granted through osmosis, not through violence.
Relation comprehends violence, marks its distance.
It is passage, not primarily spatial, that passes itself off as passage, and confronts the imaginary’
- ‘Poetics Of Relation’, Édouard Glissant.
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DECOLONIAL HEALING TEMPLATES
Offering a De-colonial Sound Healing Ritual Template, means to me, to not ‘prescribe’ from a place of being ‘outside looking in’ from some kind of hierarchy or from having been untouched, plastic or removed from the co carrying of the flesh-blood of an issue.
I do not believe as a healer to only ‘stay in my bliss’ as I find this more impenetrable aspect of sovereignty another proliferation of shadows of hyper individualism. I find it very important to feel into the spaces of what others are going through - but to not stay there or get stuck there.
Allowing ourselves to be touched by the world (as catalyst) but not ‘drawn fully into it’ as a sacrafice.
I aim to become mutable in meeting you where you are at, attune to where you are and journey with you into the direct of a central alignment, sometimes this is done by absorbing projections, or reflecting back counter-projections to instigate safe(r) modes of containment and self - governance.
Empowerment does not exist in isolation - from where is the Power is coming?
From who or what is it coming from?
Healthy Power comes from Compassionate Sources and these are Collectivly trusted Sources. (Ie: Nature Spirits, Elements, Animal Instinct.)
We claim Power from what is and always was ours.
We dont need to take it from co-opted sources.
Our Empowerment cannot come at the expense of not including someone or something, or a spirit.
Mother Earth & Grand Mother Cosmos - these are origin powers, supportive & protective.
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HOW TO LISTEN TO THIS RECORDING
Do not listen to this recording while operating machinery or driving a car or riding a bicycle on the street. As this is an altered state journey, it is best received in an undisurbed location where you can put in some headphones, lie back, prefereably within a cocoon of blankets and close your eyes or cover them with a blindfold.
As we open the space together maybe you can light a candle or burn some incense. When burning incense it is a good idea to open the windows to enable any energy to leave the space & allow fresh air in.
If you do not have access to candles, dont worry! In the recording I am lighting three in the middle of our shared circle. Hold them in your vison & receive their glow.
When you enter a circle such as this one, it will always be there for you to revisit in the future through memories. At any point in time you may return to this recording and re-experience the session. Once we have been in circle together the bonds of the Power is never broken. May you return here to this circle when needing to either offload Power or receive Power.
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We open a circle of kinship, together bow our heads, connected as seekers of salvation.
Wishing you a Powerful Journey through the Ritual.
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Sarah
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#decolonialhealingtemplate #descent #initiation #relational #kinship #prophecies #spokenintobeing #alteredstates #ritual #soundhealing #guidedmeditation
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2024 Summer, above
2025 Summer below
SPACES OF PSYCHIC BELONGING
(Kinship Research in Process)
Spring 2024 - ongoing
ROOTED COLLECTIVE BED FOR EARTH, NATURE & COMMUNITY CONNECTION
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Transformation needs a Vessel.
Manifestation needs a Vessel.
The Vessel, The Body, The Reality, these are collectivly formed, accumulated, relational.
Spaces of Pyschic Belonging is A Research Ceremony Process, which describes ongoing ‘works’ which are space holders, anchors in the grid, based on relational based community re-generation and belonging: free-formed together with community.
There are three spaces in process under this research title.
- B-16 Gardening Plot in Templehof’s Garden Verein. (Berlin) (online through Telegram)
- Sarah’s Praxis Discord Server : Intra Ryhtyms (online)
- Female:Pressure Discord Server (online)
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Kinship, is Intersectional, yet also manages to bridge differences through nuance, empathy & story.
Kinship operates on the agreement that we leave our relational impact on the Other as something that benefits the Other as much as it benefits us.
How to Participate:
B-16 :
- This is an Open Network, centralising & affirming Feminine, Yin, Queer, Trans, Two Spirit & BIPOC Identities as Sacred Teachers.
- This is also a recharge location, where we give into the Earth.
- To join the B-16 Telegram send Sarah an email.
- The idea is that you tune into intution, into the group, and into the land and community of the location. We allow ourselves to shape and be shaped by the experience, and the seeking of belonging.
Seeking to Belong powers a lot of our Shadow behaviours, we are conditioned to constantly seek external validation from the top of the heirachical system (capitalist, patriachial, imago) instead of listening to our own wisdom: knowing our own heart. This conditioning and lack of alternative spaces can keep us looped into a validation seeking cycle from places which keep us small and disempowered.
The system conditions us this way through advertising, marketing, rhetoric in politics & media, beauty standards body-image, religion & societal norms (which get mistaken as ethics), as form of control. When we are powerless we are easy to control. When we are power-full, we are able to make choices, we are less easy for to control.
For bodies who are going through transformational healing from dysfunctional systems, perhaps going no contact with family, or perhaps shifting their entire auric grid, which means dissolving partnerships that no longer serve, and rebuilding a foundation to allow partnerships that do serve,
Being in community who speak certain language and understand this experience is extremely valuable as we can develop a mutual language of belonging to ourselves, eachother and the earth.
Belonging to eachother in intersectional community also means bridging the times when we disagree: allowing that to occur without abandoning eachother, or making the other bad/wrong.
Belonging to a peice of earth, to a garden, is a great teaching in abundance, non attachment, receptivity, seeing and peace.
UPON THE PSYCHIC CORRESPONDENCE OF DIGITAL FLESH
(Yin’s Return)
2023-2024
C-REFUND
RITUAL PRAXIS FOR POST DIGITAL INTIMACIES
ASMR, Ambient, Dub & Broken Beat, live sound.
Whispered Teachings & Aural Psychic-Ecologies.
Performed with variations on the following:
Computer, 4-7 Channels in-Mixer, Microphones, Gong & Shakers, Vocals, Analogue Machines.
Visuals : Spiral Fractals layer upon moving and reflecing surfaces of water & waterfalls.
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This is a gaze opening mediation - to crack open the digital body, as an incubative portal for exiled psychic parts.
Yin is re-turning us to embrace our porousivity ~ multi-filament psychic architectures mediate a relational Open and Close through 5th divide towards digital-other.
This electro acoustic groove-based collective research ceremony; comprising three whispered meditational movements; from Sarah's research praxis into energetic algorithm and relational psychic space; "Upon The Psychic Correspondence of Digital Flesh” and acts as depth & holding practice in preparation for the sensorial body diving into post-digital future(s), towards co-emerging Yin.
Suggested to receive lying or sitting on the floor, please bring a cushion or blanket along with you for comfort, and any power objects to carry you in this experience.
Open The Body, Reset the Algorithms of Mirror Mind, Take a Psychic Bath in Digital Waters.
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Performed live, Open Air, June 8th 2024, Atomino X Radio Raheem Stage, Kosmos Festival, Chemnitz.
Performed live, with Visuals, Nov 3rd, 2023, Kasper Theatre, Böhmische Platz, NK, Berlin.
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Practices referencing Huichol (multiperspective), Dagara (water), Wu (Qi), Toltec (attention & counterpraxis), and Kānaka Maoli (444, reciprocity) especially guided this practice with respect and gratitude to Original Wisdom Keepers. Funds from performances were re-routed to protect indigenous knowlegde systems & building water wells in Gaza.
Sounds and concept seeded through research-residency ‘Body In Algorithms’, aligning with the written work of essay ‘Shadow Body in Encoded System’.
The Digital Praxis was informed by Ceremony held with a collective of research attendants - at Dance In The Digital Waterfall, July 2021.
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Access the previews to seperate parts of this work, as seeded in the following sound projects:
- Algorithm Of the Mirror Mind
- INANNA’s DESCENT
- To Open And Close Digital Space
- Dance in The Digital Waterfall
Image with big thanks to Ramona Tyler for her cosy perspective.
First-Session Inter-Relations, Kwia Berlin, May 2022.
Inter Relations was hosted by Dj’s Hysteria [Ray Pham] and Dj Nob.
INANNA’S DESCENT [LIVE SET]
Psychic Images appear as Rites-In-Sound
Upon the Correspondence Of Your Flesh
Live Electronics, Gong, Shakers.
I Hour electroacoustic earthy mediation groove
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Through poetry inscribed into stone, Sumeria, [c. 1900-1600 BCE] we learn about INANNA.
Her story is a quest into the transformational-meditative-dark to reveal true destiny of the inner receptive vessel within all, as seed for new design.
‘C-Refund presents Innana’s Descent’ is an electro-acoustic psychic-ecology of earthy-meditation-groove: dark, humid, multi-pathways, through under-and-lowerworld, reuniting us with animal-body and the power of the lower-realms as rite of passage.
Future-sound-imprint ‘Inanna’s Descent’; is dedicated with gratitude to synth-reiki-spiritualist, the beautiful, fantastic and inspiring, now-angel : Pauline Anna Strom.
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We enter this sound journey with a mediation into Algorithm of the Mirror-Mind, towards Animal Power drums and shakers [forthcoming sound from Sarah’s research praxis], meeting at The Gates with Sun Gong.
Nephthys, Goddess of The Temple walks us through midnight waxy-jungles. What happens after that ~ is your experience.
We come back into [?real life?] with a moment from Pauline Anna Strom for heart-opening send off through crystal waves.
💧~ Water is The Way Home ~ 💧
[message from a dream]
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Sampled-gong played by Roberta Perzolla of Spirit Yurt.
Whispers, Rattles, Drums and Flute by me.
Algorithm of the Mirror-Mind, recorded thanks to @adrienne.teicher
Sounds and Concepts supported by Residencies Body In Algorithm from Zero Corners, and Music Board Berlin’s Uckermark Residency in Studio Stern at Sternhagen Gut, with Gudrun Gut.
Psychic Images appear as Rites-In-Sound
Upon the Correspondence Of Your Flesh
Live Electronics, Gong, Shakers.
I Hour electroacoustic earthy mediation groove
------------------
Through poetry inscribed into stone, Sumeria, [c. 1900-1600 BCE] we learn about INANNA.
Her story is a quest into the transformational-meditative-dark to reveal true destiny of the inner receptive vessel within all, as seed for new design.
‘C-Refund presents Innana’s Descent’ is an electro-acoustic psychic-ecology of earthy-meditation-groove: dark, humid, multi-pathways, through under-and-lowerworld, reuniting us with animal-body and the power of the lower-realms as rite of passage.
Future-sound-imprint ‘Inanna’s Descent’; is dedicated with gratitude to synth-reiki-spiritualist, the beautiful, fantastic and inspiring, now-angel : Pauline Anna Strom.
------------------
We enter this sound journey with a mediation into Algorithm of the Mirror-Mind, towards Animal Power drums and shakers [forthcoming sound from Sarah’s research praxis], meeting at The Gates with Sun Gong.
Nephthys, Goddess of The Temple walks us through midnight waxy-jungles. What happens after that ~ is your experience.
We come back into [?real life?] with a moment from Pauline Anna Strom for heart-opening send off through crystal waves.
💧~ Water is The Way Home ~ 💧
[message from a dream]
————
Sampled-gong played by Roberta Perzolla of Spirit Yurt.
Whispers, Rattles, Drums and Flute by me.
Algorithm of the Mirror-Mind, recorded thanks to @adrienne.teicher
Sounds and Concepts supported by Residencies Body In Algorithm from Zero Corners, and Music Board Berlin’s Uckermark Residency in Studio Stern at Sternhagen Gut, with Gudrun Gut.